My granny is 88,and lives alone and although vulnerable she is pretty fit and independant. My parents used to live 20mins away and would visit her twice a week and were always on hand in emergencies.They have now retiered and moved several hundres miles away from the town where granny lives, I grew up in and they all lived all their lives.

I live a long way awa, have a long term disability and don't drive. Mum and dad want to move granny near to their new house but understandably she doesn't want to be uprooted from her home, her friends and neighbours and the place she's lived all her adult life. I am inclined to agree with her- why should she move?! However, I am really concerned about her too and worried that there is no family nearby to make sure she is ok.

It seems so unfair to move her. I want to be able to make some suggestions and come up with a plan to see that she is going to be safe and happy without having to move- My parents are very controlling and I dont want her to be bullied into moving but I want her to ok. I am very worrierd and wish I could do more-

I'd be really gratefull for your thoughts or advice!!! Many thanks.

Hello
   Just a few thoughts: you say Granny is pretty fit and independent although 'vulnerable'.  Why is she vulnerable?
   Apart from that, I agree with you.  It was your parents' decision entirely to uproot themselves and move hundreds of miles away and if I was Granny, I'd be saying 'well, that's your choice entirely but don't involve me in it'.  It sounds as if they made this move in the expectation that they could just move Granny as if she was a sack of potatoes, with no wishes or feelings of her own! I detest that sort of thinking, which we do tend to hear of from time to time.  Like an ad for a local McCarthy&Stone development 'Move your parents nearer to you!' I really hate the assumption that older people's needs, wishes and individuality can be so disregarded.
   Ask HtA what support services there may be in Granny's own locality.  There are volunteers who pop in on a regular basis to do the kind of things your parents used to do.  Above all stick up for Granny and don't let her be manipulated in this way!
   Best wishes