I am Emma Little and am studying at Univeristy for a degree in Drama and English. Currently I am doing a project on Old Age Loneliness in the hope of turning it into a stage production. I need people to tell me about thier experiences with either old age parents or from being a carer. It would be good for me to get 'real' stories form 'real' people.I feel that this is a very important subject which many young people do not understand fully. I would really appreicate if you could give me your own accounts, even if you dont think thats its worthy, it may be of use to me. Thankyou for yout time. Emma

Hello Emma

Although I'm not 'lonely' - am in a very happy second marriage - I think that one of the points to consider is the fact that, as you grow older, you 'outlive' many of the people who were important to you in your life.  Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, teachers and then those in your own generation - siblings, friends, work colleagues - and even those younger than yourself, people you wouldn't have expected to die before you.

All these people are there in the background as it were, like so many ghosts, because they were all people who, to a greater or lesser degree, had some influence on your own life, helped to make you the person you are.  Ultimately there will be more of these people from the past than there are people in the present, and it seems to me that it's the people of the present day who may seem to be shadowy, like ghosts, and of no importance compared with those who have gone before.

Well, that's just a thought, anyway.

Hello Magaret

Thankyou for replying back to me, it's of great help. It's a shame that you are so unhappy. Do you mind me asking roughly how old you are? I.e. 50s 60s 70s? You don't have to disclose this information if you dont want to, but it would help me in my research. Are you in any way scared of getting older? As from research so far I have found that actually the younger generation are scared of getting older. This is worrying to me as they dont have any idea what its like to be 'old' in the first place, so how can they be scared?

Emma, you have misunderstood me completely.  I never said that I was unhappy.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  I am 73, have been in a happy second marriage for almost 7 years, we've been together for 11 years.  This followed 5 years of widowhood and, for him, 2 divorces.  We couldn't be happier together!  I did say I am not 'lonely' and what I wrote was in general terms, an observation of life, what I see around me. 

My feeling about people who are 'unhappy' is that too many people do not reach out to new opportunities that may come their way, reach out to all that is going on around them and get involved, or that they expect someone else - sons, daughters etc - to do it all for them, make them happy in other words! But certainly, you do outlive very many of those who meant a great deal to you in earlier years.

I do apologise MargaretClare. Whoops, reading at night does nothing for your eyesight. Thankyou for replying though, your own thoughts have opened new avenues for research for my project.

Emma, I am 62yrs young and I've been alone(living) for over 5yrs. Lonely yes in some ways, eating, watching TV, most friends have partners, but I'm not unhappy. I think that we ajust and deal with things different. I work part time and I'm surrounded with people most in their 20's. Being around young people keeps my prospective young. I also have an 81yr ols Mother that has been alone for 10+ yrs. If you would like any further in sight on lonelyness with us two, you can contact me at sculpturelady@msn.com I'll be glad to answer question. Catherine