I am in my early 30's with elderly parents.  My dad is a very sprightly 80 year old although he has been losing his zest over the past few years as my mother has been suffering with ill health which in the last 6 months has prevented her from walking.  I have been trying to persuade them to ask for help but they are very proud and are scared that social services or people with not their best interests at heart will interfere.  I am living a couple  of hours drive away in London and due to my work commitments cannot get down to them as much as I would like.  My dad insists that I live my life with my partner and not to worry about them but they are my mum and dad and they devoted so much time to me, what sort of daughter would I be if I did not worry.  I recently visited to find that my dad is struggling to keep on top of the domestic chores. I want to get some home help just to do the general house work and shopping etc for them.  But I don't want to get someone through an advert etc.  Does anyone know of any organisations in Sussex, specifically East Sussex that have people that do this sort of thing voluntarily?  Its just that my parents do not have much money, however due to my dad's small civil service pension they don't qualify for the same help that those on benefits do.  Unfortunately, neither myself or my partner have achieved the financial situation where we can be able to employ someone.  To be honest I would rather have someone voluntary that really cares about what they are doing and is not interested in the money.  That is the sort of person my parents need right now.  Please if anyone can advise me I would be really grateful as I am finding this all really hard as I love my parents so much and I just wish I was in a better position to do more.

Hi Lucille,

Oh dear!!  I'm afraid I can't offer you much in the way of advice, other than to contact Social Services and explain your predicament to them.

They may be able to put you in touch with voluntary organisations in your area which are "approved" and will also provide you with advice about assistance your parents might be entitled to.

http://www.ageconcern-eastsussex.org.uk/care.html

This Age Concern branch offers some services that may be of use to your parents.

This section may be of particular use:-

Age Concern local groups

Age Concern East Sussex supports 20 local voluntary Age Concern groups who offer a range of services such as lunch clubs, exercise sessions, visiting service, transport for shopping and outings, bathing, aids to daily living, home care and holidays. Further information is available from our offices in Lewes and Rother.