The aim is for you to talk in a way that helps you to understand yourself better. It is not a sign of weakness or lack of support from your family to seek help from a talking treatment.

Individual counselling

This can take place face to face, or over the telephone or by email. It can be a one-off session or a regular arrangement for a specific amount of time, but can also be open-ended.

Counselling is a chance for you to talk about whatever is proving difficult for you or causing you problems. The counsellor is not there to tell you what you to do, but to listen and to help you to identify the best way forward. Counselling can be helpful to address an immediate problem as well as more entrenched matters.

Often people are interested in having counselling, but are not sure how to go about it. About 50 per cent of GP surgeries now have a counselling service, often restricted to a set number of sessions. There are also a number of voluntary organisations that can provide counselling services. For example:

• The charity MIND offers counselling through its network of over 200 local Mind associations.
• The charity Cruse Bereavement Care can provide information and counselling for people affected by a death.
• The Cancer Counselling Trust can provide in person and telephone counselling for cancer patients, their families, friends and care givers who seek counselling to help them through the difficult issues precipitated by a cancer diagnosis.

There are also likely to be local mental health organisations offering counselling in your area, many of these will be charities who aim to provide affordable counselling and will have a sliding scale of charges.

Some employers offer access to counselling as part of an Employee Assistance Programme.

The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy holds details of individual counsellors registered with them as members, and lists their qualifications.  It has strict rules of membership and is a good place to start if you are looking for a qualified counsellor.

MIND, the national association for mental health, has a detailed fact sheet called ‘Making Sense of Counselling’.

Relationship or family counselling

This is where couples or family members attend sessions and work with a counsellor to improve their relationship. The aim is to encourage better communication and understanding of differing points of view or behaviour.  Ask your GP or local social services department for information on local services or the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy can guide you towards relationship counsellors in your area.

Relate is the UK's largest provider of relationship counselling and other relationship support services. Relate has 82 Centres across England, Wales and Northern Ireland. You can fill in an enquiry form on their website as well as find out about books and guides written especially for older people.

Tel: 0845 456 1310
Email here

Psychotherapy

There are many different types of psychotherapy (which can overlap quite a bit with counselling). This talking treatment takes place in regular one to one sessions with a psychotherapist. In general the aim of psychotherapy is to help you to understand your feelings by exploring what lies behind your responses to other people and the things that happen to you. Talking can help you to deal with painful feelings and to identify more helpful ways of behaving or handling situations.

For example psychotherapy could help someone who has developed an eating disorder to explore what might have contributed to that and so develop a new perspective, which in turn may help them to change their behaviour and eat more healthily. Psychotherapy can be useful for specific problems as well as for more general feelings or behaviour. The length and regularity of therapy sessions can vary from once to several times a week, it is not usually available on the NHS.

MIND, the national association for mental health, has a detailed fact sheet called ‘Making Sense of Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis’.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

This is a practical treatment that aims to identify and change negative thoughts and feelings that can affect your behaviour.  It focuses on specific problem-solving techniques and aims to enable people to develop new methods of coping with difficulties.

MIND, the national association for mental health, has a detailed fact sheet called 'Making Sense of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy'.

Group therapy

This is where a set group of people meet together regularly, with a therapist, and talk about their concerns. This is a chance, in a safe and supportive environment, to hear how people see you and how your behaviour affects them. It can also provide the opportunity to try out different ways of behaving and talking, which can be helpful in changing how you behave with other people. Group therapy can sound daunting, but many people find it to be very helpful.

Self-help groups 

A self-help group is a group of people with the same problem or health concern getting together to share experiences, offer support and improve their understanding of that problem. There is a wide range of self-help groups available across the UK.

Some are branches of national organisations and some are independent groups. Most meet up on a regular basis. There is also now the option of joining a virtual self-help group through a message board on the Internet.

Finding a self-help group

The MIND website can guide you to local Mind groups in England and Wales offering crisis helplines, drop-in centres, counselling, befriending, advocacy, employment and training schemes.

Or call MindinfoLine: 0845 766 0163 Monday to Friday 9.15am to 5.15pm (local call rate)

The Depression Alliance website lists self-help support groups for people who have depression.

The Princess Royal Trust for Carers can provide details of support for carers around the UK.

To find out about other local self help or support groups contact your local Councils for Voluntary Service or Voluntary Action organisation. The telephone number will be in your local telephone directory, or try the contacts below.

In England, The National Association of Councils for Voluntary Service (NACVS) can tell you how to contact your local CVS.
Tel: 0114 278 6636
Email here 

In Northern Ireland, contact the Northern Ireland Council for Voluntary Action.
Tel: 028 9087 7777
Email here

In Scotland, contact the Scottish Council for Voluntary Organisations.
Tel: 0131 556 3882
Email here 

In Wales, contact Wales Council for Voluntary Action.
Tel: 029 2043 1700
Email here